A Mother and a Daughter -Elsie Greenwell Upton and Margaret Upton Waning - Mayo Clinic 1951

Mayo Clinic

There are some events which go down in family lore and help to define the meaning of family.  I think that the Upton women's trip in April of 1951 to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota was one such event.  

In the spring of 1951 Elsie Upton was diagnosed with breast cancer.  There was only one "cancer doctor" in Eugene/Springfield at the time, and due to the recent loss of a friend from cancer, Elsie was not enamored of him.  With the help of her G.P., Dr. Gardner, and the Waning's G.P., Dr. Guldager, it was decided that Elsie would go to the Mayo Clinic for a 2nd opinion and have the surgery performed there. The Eugene G.P.s felt that it was a medical emergency and insisted that the women fly to Minnesota, rather than take the train.  This would be the first plane trip for the two of then.  

And so, Margaret Upton Waning made the trip with her mother.  Margaret was a busy, young (35 years old) wife and mother.  In order to be with Elsie, she arranged for Connie to stay with the Waning Grandparents, Sandie to stay with the Helen Scott Family, and Barbara went to Mrs. Clarkson with

additional supervision from Hope, the family's baby-sitter.  She stayed with Elsie through the beginning of May.  Margaret then returned to Eugene.  Elsie remained in Rochester with a privately hired "daily nurse" for continued exams and therapy until about the 20th of May 1951. 

Below are five of letters which Margaret sent home to her husband, Jim Waning.  

Colonial Hospital

"April 19, 1951 Thursday P.M. (3:30)

Dearest Hubby -

Here we are back at the Hotel - Have spent most of the day since this morning, waiting here & there.  The Clinic is just a block from here.  They declared Mom "an emergency" case so she is being "processed" much faster that usual I guess.  A Dr. gave her a complete physical this afternoon & she has to report to one more office this afternoon & a whole flock of them in the morning - on Sat. she reports back to the Dr.  He says that the lump, arm, & breast all being so sore seems to indicate to him a tumor rather than a cancer - well keep your fingers crossed.

I expect you are wondering about our trip here - the flight was grand & I believe Mom is now a confirmed flier - says she & the girls will go visiting that way when she gets well.  I had a few "butter-files" in my tummy as we left the ground - but soon got over that.  While it was four-thirty when we got into Minneapolis, it actually only took 5 hours as we had to turn our watches up two hours.  Didn't see much scenery as it was very foggy most of the way.  Flew at 15,000 ft to Spokane - just 1 hour.  The Mt. peaks Rainier & some I didn't know stuck up through the fog & were beautiful - we were in the sunshine.  However shortly after we got out of Spokane we were in the fog (flew at 17,ooo ft) & didn't get out again till we were over S. Dakota.  Was disappointed not to see the Rockies.  From Minneapolis down here (by bus) took 3 hrs & Mom said the hardest part of the trip.  Of course we were kinda tired by then & they told us at the air-port we could fly down in 1/2 an hr.  Mom was all for it - but Dr. Gardner had said no & I didn't think we had better. (Small planes).  Somewhere between 75 & 50 passengers on the big one.

It is a beautiful sunny day - but cold & windy - like Portland in Jan. with the East wind blowing.  Coming down on the bus you could see snow in patches in the shade - under trees & etc.  It seems so funny - at home the kids in shorts & here still in snow suits - not a green blade of grass - no leaves on the trees & of course not a posy.  Going to have to get something warmer to wear as my suit is the only thing I have with me warm at all.

Have thought so much about you - the kids & the garden & all.  Was homesick before I got to Portland.  It seems like I am always going away without you.  I know you would have enjoyed the plane ride & I would have enjoyed it more if you had been along.

Have just brought Mom back from having an x-ray.  Tomorrow morning she has a blood test - 8 o'clock & no breakfast.  Lordy I didn't realize there were so many sick people.  Every kind & description - next to our table at lunch were a table of 5 or 6 people speaking Spanish (probably from Mexico) while waiting for Mom I sat next to a man from Canada.  I noticed a girl at the registration desk who seemed to be acting as interpreter for several people.

Well honey it's about 5 o'clock - guess we will have an early supper & go to a show - Mom thought she would like to see "Royal Wedding" with Fred Astaire.  One more working day for you - don't work all your weekends.  And you better go see Connie - tell your Mom I'll write to her soon.

All my love & kisses,

Marg.

Haven't seen any interns or Drs yet that I would go for!"

  

Zumbro Hotel

"April 21 1951

Dearest -

Gee was I ever please to have a letter waiting when we got in today.  I really didn't expect one so soon but sure was happy to have one - darn it I'm lonesome.  Mom & I had been doing some shopping & had a bite of lunch.  Got some cute dresses for the girls - you know the first thing they'll say is What did you bring me?  It's raining "cats & dogs" or something out - glad I brought an umbrella - wonder what your weather is like & if you are still rising early.  By the way I told you - you might need the feather blanket to keep you warm if I wasn't there to keep you warm.

Well we know part of the verdict - the same as Gardner said - Mom will enter the Colonial Hospital Sunday for an operation Mon. morning.  A Dr. Kirkland will do the operation.  He seems very young - but the Drs here are supposed to be the best so let's hope.  He described the operation just as Dr. Guldager did - about removing a piece of the tissue & examining it to tell the extent of the operation.  Wish you were going to be here to help me wait.

Haven't seen any of the Blooming Prairie folks.  Had thought about going tomorrow - but won't now as Mom must go to the hospital - will go later when she won't need me quite so much.  She has been quite cheerful through it all - says she is anxious to have it over - but I know she's scared - keeps remembering everybody who has died with it - Mrs. Phibbs, Mrs. Kelsey & etc.  I don't blame her as I woulds be doing the same thing in her place.  She is pretty dizzy today - maybe because we went to another show last night.  Saw "Up Front" it was a war picture - but more on the funny side rather than on the grim.  Wondered if you went out to play canasta last nite & will go to a show tonight.

Have had a couple of nice letters from Ellen.  It sure helps to hear from home & by the way I don't think you have ever written them thanking them for your birthday things.  You might tell my eldest also middle-sized kids that they might write to their mother & Grandmother.  Barb mustn't fuss about the eating (?) - Mrs. C. does the very best she knows and it will hurt her a lot if she thinks Barb criticizes.

One nice thing - this hospital Mom will be in is connected with this underground passage (or subway they call it) as is the Clinic, hotel - in fact 2 other hotels - so don't need to get wet.  Glad Dr. G. steered us here.  At the worst Mom will be in the hospital about a week with 3 or 4 weeks convil. - depending if they have to treat her as well.  If she can make it without me don't plan to stay longer than 3 weeks - will see.  

Sure miss you & the kids - love to you all & a special hug & kiss for you.

Your old lady,

Marg."           

Bird's Eye View of Rochester

"23 April 1951 Monday 4P.M.

Dear Jimmie -

Well now it is over & we know the worst (and the best).  It was cancer & they had to perform a "Radical" operation.  But they said none of the glands removed from under the arm or neck were affected & that is good.  She will need no further treatments & has every chance of a good recovery with no further complications - tho' sometimes they do go in pairs - there is no sign of any in the left breast.

I think I told you before - the "radical" operation is the removal of the breast & all glands connected with it - under arm side of the neck, etc.  I went over at 20 till to see her before they took her up about 8.  They took me up to the lab at 11 to see the specimen & explain the operation.  I got a special (private nurse) for her for several days & I hope nights.  She (the nurse) was there when I came back from the lab - so went out for a bite of lunch (also breakfast) - bought Mom a doz. beautiful red roses & came back to the hospital - where I have just left.  The house Dr (asst. surgeon) says she is doing very well - blood pressure good & etc.  She is still mostly asleep & looks awfully white & frail - but guess that's to be expected.  Thought I would get a line off to you & Ellen - get a bite of supper & go back.

Tell Helen (Helen Scott) I got her most welcome letter as I came in & I just loved it - hearing about everybody & everything.  I will answer in a day or two.

I sure missed you this day - it has been awfully long - but guess the worst is over.

All my love, 

Margaret"  

Silver Lake & Falls

"April 26 1951

Dearest Jimmie -

Gee it was nice to hear you talk the other nite - only made me homesick.  You sounded as if you must be in the next room.

Not too much to write about - but thought I would let you know I'm thinking about you.  The weather started clearing yesterday afternoon & this morning it is beautiful - didn't go to breakfast by subway this morning.  I get up about quarter to seven & eat breakfast about 8 o'clock.  Then back to my room & write letters - Mom had about 20 that she wanted me to write - that's besides writing to your folks at home & Ellen.  Just wrote a letter to Dr. Guldager.  Thought he had been kind enough to help us out - so maybe he would be interested in knowing how we are making out.  I go to see Mother three times a day - 10:30 to 11:30 - 2:30 to 4:30 & from 7:30 to 8:30.  Last nite didn't feel like coming up to the room when I left Mom - so went to a show - first I've been to since last Friday nite - so see I don't go every nite.  Saw "The Gambler" with Victor Mature - it was just fair - and I don't like to go by myself - even if you go to sleep I know you are there - even if you say I don't know the difference.

Mom looked good yesterday - she sat up a couple of times in a chair & ate a little & seemed to be quite comfortable - she hadn't had any shots since the nite before.  I am going to pay for her special nurse - that isn't so much when you consider everything but wanted to help a little.  I bought her a nice box of candy to pass out to her nurses - also got her a beautiful bouquet of red roses from all of us.  Ellen & family sent her an azalea - it is a pink one - full of blooms & very lovely.  Ellen has been good about writing - either a card or letter almost every day.  Mom's special (nurse) reminds me of Mrs. Johnson.  She is older & a little deaf - but she is very good to Mom - talks quite a lot and thinks that good for Mom - not so much time then to think of her own troubles.  Mother said Dr. Kirklin (the one who did the operation) was in to see her yesterday & his ass't was in twice - they changed the dressings - guess that was kind of painful.  They were having her exercise her right arm so it wouldn't be stiff.

Well honey, expect I better get to answering or writing some of these letters Mom wants me to write - worst of it is I'm starting to get replies already - no rest for the wicked & I don't like to write letters.   

Love -

Marg.

You know it wouldn't be half bad back here - now worst is over - if you were just here - see couples all the time and it makes me lonesome.

Kiss the kids for me."   

Elsie Greenwell Upton about 1961

"Apr 29 - 1951

Dearest Hubby -

Just this very minute got your letter dated Apr. 26 - and if you are any more lonesome than me - well just don't believe you are.  Wish we could have that honeymoon - but don't know - Mom wants to go when I do.  She is getting out of the hospital & they told her she could go home in a week or two.  Personally I think they are letting her out too early - but who am I to say?  She is recovering nicely from the operation - but she's in bed most of the time.  Seems to me she would be better off right there where her meals are served & there is some one to look after her all the time.  I expect that I can do most of it - the bathing & everything - but I'm going to have to pack her meals better than two blocks - oh well!  I've for most of the letters written (over 20 for her - that's not counting the ones to you folks & Ellen) so maybe I haven't any thing else to do.

The 29th, day light savings, huh?  Don't think they have it here - or at least I haven't heard anything about it.  Helen and Mrs. C. are going to have their hands full trying to get our kids out of bed an hour earlier in the morning I bet.  Sorry you are so tired & sleepy - always felt someway - that it was my fault you didn't get to bed early - guess not tho' if I'm not even there wonder if you are sleeping in this morning or working on your Cat.  I might even help you sleep if the kids didn't come bouncing in at the wrong time or company or something.  Maybe I'm not nice but have been wishing Ellen might have taken over (Mom I mean) when I get home - just for a while so you & I could have a little time together & I wouldn't be all tired & cross.

It's warm & sultry today - has been warm the past several days & people are noticing it - cause it has been so cold & disagreeable.

Mom's special will help us get settled tomorrow & said she would stay with her Tue. while I went to Blooming Prairie (to see McAdam relatives).  Called up a drive yourself place = they have Fords for $8 a day & 8 cents a mile or Pontiacs for $9 a day & 9 cents a mile so I think I'll take one - they aren't hydramatic - don't know if I'll remember to use the clutch or not.

I hear music playing - they have Clarion bells on the top of the Clinic that play half an hour or so every afternoon & an hour or more Sunday mornings - very pretty.

Well dear, guess this is enough scribbling for a while - will let you know about coming home when I know.

All my very best love & kisses to you honey.

Marg.

Will read the funnies - St. Paul Paper & go to lunch pretty soon.  The bellboy isn't even handsome - woe is me.  A Dr's convention going on & I haven't even run across a good looking Dr.  The elevator is run my a middle aged lady.  Course if you were here - there are a lot of cute nurses at the hospital - 'taint fair!"

Note on back of envelope: "Mom & I decided she would stay in the Hospital a few more days"